fear 2/2

my experiment was a success. i was able to look my fear in the face through a fairly safe manor and i definately feel more comfortable around it.

for those who don't know, i am deathly afraid of heights. for example, for spring i went to panama city with about 20ish friends. our room was on the 15th floor and the hallways were exposed to the outside. whenever we traveled to/from our room i would walk as close to the wall as i could; i couldn't even look over the edge. we had guys in another hotel who were on the 19th floor, and were surrounded by concrete. each time i would take a look, all i could see was gravity pulling me down to the concrete.

my experiment was simple, and my girlfriend's idea. she's a lifeguard at the iu nat(atorium), and during one of the lifeguard's inservice sessions they let me walk out on each of the diving platforms and look over the edge. granted i used to swim, and if i did fall there i would land in water, i was still scared sh!tless the first time i went all the way up.

i was actually surprised with people's reactions.

• my girlfriend had explained my fear to all the lifeguards
• they actually cheered when i was all the way up
• aly (gf) was running camera and was a solid model of support
  
• i originally didn't think that this would have any effect on my phobia, but...

i am now not afraid to look down when i'm going to work on the 3rd floor of the campus center. what starts the fear is my overactive imagination. i see myself falling over for whatever reason and all i can think about is the impact. i still see these visualizations, but now i'm not afraid of them.

i've always wanted to go skydiving even though i know i'm so afraid of heights but now i really want to go more because i feel that would help with this phobia that i'm starting to overcome.

for my project i'm making a video, but unfortunately i've had some issues with file formats. i just now was able to convert them into usable files and will start editing now, so hopefully i will have a finished product to show you.